Drunk Parents

Man: "... after six days of crazy..." 
”... six days of crazy...” (0:00)

College freshman Rachel Teagarten tells her parent Nancy and Frank, "... have them memorized." (0:01)

Frank tells the repo man, "I started a medical company... a medical innovation..." 
Repo man: ”... Sell some crack...” (0:04)

Frank asks neighbor Jason, "... are you making a handicap joke?" (0:06)

Nancy asks Frank, "Have you lost your mind?..." 
Frank: ”... That’s insane.” (0:10)

Nancy tells Frank, "... used to strip coca tree bark... The coca then, would leech into their bloodstream... " (0:11)

Nancy tells Heidi, “... should we charge for it... 4.20?...” (0:16)

By telephone, Nancy tells Frank, "... I’m having an anxiety attack." (0:16)

Frank tells Nancy, "I don’t remember..." (0:17)

Carl Mancini tells Frank, "... Getz did the soundtrack for Mickey One... Micky One’s not for everyone. You have to be patient, unlike Star Wars... Same with Dances with Wolves..." 
”... I’m a pedophile.” (0:18)

Frank tells Nancy, "Don’t, uh, forget your prescriptions..." (0:21)

Frank tells Carl, "... like to punch you in the face..." 
”... Are you outta your... mind?..” (0:22)

Frank tells Nancy, "Maybe I’m losing my mind." 
Referring to Janice: ”... she’s any smarter than you.” 
”You were craving Baby Ruths.” (0:23)

Nancy: “Frank, why don’t we sell our funeral plots?” (0:25)

A man asks Frank, "What’s up, pervert?" 
A man punches Frank in the head. (0:25)

A man tells Nancy, "... deviants like you." (0:27)

Nancy tells Frank, "... I’m gonna get an anxiety attack.” 
Frank: ”... those psychos said...” 
Nancy: ”... Oompa Loompas on speed...” (0:29)

Frank’s nephew Tristan: "... Tai Chi’s for homos..." (0:30)

Frank’s brother Bob Donnelly tells Frank and Nancy, referring to spiders, "... biting everything like crazy." (0:31)

Nancy tells Frank, "... Oompa Loompa’s are not on speed. They are on angel dust..." 
Frank: ”... I think you were drunk at the time.” 
Nancy: ”I think was drunk at the time?” (0:33)

Nancy tells Frank, “... molesting your nephew... worried for her." 
Frank: ”... some court-appointed therapist...” (0:36)

Frank tells Nancy, "Don’t panic..." (0:37)

Frank tells the others, "... we don’t have to worry about..." (0:40)

Nancy: "... Don't panic..." (0:41)

Frank tells Randall, "... you get punched in the face..." (0:43)

Carl answers Nancy, referring to her closet, "I made it into a panic room.”
”... the Jody Foster movie?" 
”I’ve been really nervous...” (0:45)

Randall: "... Frank, I’m gonna be honest..." (0:46)

Nancy tells Carl, "... up and down this panic room..." 
”... a breathtaking moron...” (0:47)

Randall tells Frank, "... go meet some dead relatives..." (0:49)

Carl tells Nancy, "... I get claustrophobic." 
”... trying not to panic...” 
Nancy: ”You say all these crazy stupid things...” (0:49)

Man in video: "All you perverts..." 
Flashing on screen: “DIE PERVERTS”
Man, referring to Frank: ”... number one trending pervert on the Internet...” (0:52)

Frank throws a rock at Wayn, striking his head. (0:53)

Nancy tells Frank, "Panic room..." 
Frank tell a police officer: ”... Good sweet Christ... our sweet little neighborhood?
”Sweet Christ.” (0:54)

Nancy tells Frank, "... I’ve fantasized about getting rid of you..." (0:56)

Jason tells Nancy and Frank, "... That’s very sweet... on my dream boards..." 
”This is insane...” 
Nancy, referring to Rachel: ”... She would only worry...” 
By Skype, Rachel tells Jason, ”... I’m a little worried...” (0:57)

Nancy strikes drug dealer Shope on the head with a trash container.
Shope: ”I’m gonna bust your... head opened.”
A police officer appears to find a bag of drug. (1:03)

Nancy tells prisoner Shope, "... I’m so ashamed and, and worried." (1:05)

FBI Special Agent Chad Milhouse: "120 kilos of Norteno cocaine..." 
”... rich drug lord...” (1:06)

Bum Colin tells Frank: "Spray paint: I’d like to huff it." 
Frank: ”You wanna huff it? You wanna huff the can of spray paint?...” 
”... you... idiot.” 
Nancy: ”They were sweet.” (1:10)

Nancy answers Frank, "If good means nervous." (1:14)

Carl tells Rachel, "... Frankly, I’m worried... ever seen The Wedding Planner?”
”... don’t let this be a... dream.” (1:16)

Nancy tells Dan Henderson, "... I need you to... focus..." 
”... Andy, smart... shock us, baby...” 
Nancy tells Dan, ”... the smartest runner...” 
Frank: ”My wife is so... drunk.” (1:18)

Carl: "Nancy, I've been so worried." (1:22)

Nancy tells Rachel, "... It’s now a panic room." 
Masked man: ”Hey, pervert... Where’s the main deviant?” 
Jason: ”Don’t worry, Rach...” 
Bob bangs the men’s heads together. 
Frank: ”Okay, I understand the impulse...” (1:24)

Nancy tells Shope’s daughter Rose, "You shouldn’t worry... You’re so brave..." (1:27)

Frank tells Tristan’s brother, "... step toward recovery." (1:28)

Narrator: "... it all started when they got drunk, and because they were drunk, drunk with love for their daughter... a drunk man’s actions are a sober man’s thoughts. They were drunk parents." (1:30)